A practical gift guide for the child who has everything.
I’ve been racking my brain this year to find something, anything, to give our kids for Christmas. They just don’t need anything. Olivia only asked for one small thing, and Abby has no idea what’s going on. So after spending too much time scouring the black friday sales for gift ideas for the girls I’ve compiled my own helpful list for parents, grandparents, aunts, uncles and anyone else who buys gifts for children.
1. All the toys you took away throughout the year because they refused to clean them up. In our house this includes about 20 tons of little people and assorted cars I got sick of picking up so I just threw them into a garbage bag in the back of the closet last June and forgot about them. Just wrap those toys up and you are good to go.
2. Have little girls? How about Makeup? Specifically, all the nice, high quality, very expensive makeup that they painted the bathroom with that one time you tried to do the dishes without them underfoot. ‘
3. Candy – all the stale halloween candy from last halloween (not the most recent one, the one before that) that you hid from the kids and then rediscovered when frantically cleaning the pantry for your Thanksgiving guests. Sure they might lose a tooth but they’re just baby teeth anyways.
4. The horribly age inappropriate toy that a distant relative sent them two years ago that you stashed in the basement “for later?”. It’s now later. Still age inappropriate? Doesn’t matter, they will only care about the box it came in anyways.
5. Remember that dog you got this year because the kids just needed a family dog? Put a bow on her. Remind the kids she needs fed this morning. Merry Christmas! It’s the gift that keeps on giving.
6. For the nature loving kid – a stick. This glorious item will be fought over endlessly by your kids even though the backyard is full of them. You theoretically could wrap up one for each kid but you know they will just end up fighting over whichever one is arbitrarily deemed the “best” one. Bonus points if they use it as a weapon on their siblings, then you can head into my next gift idea…
7. Costco sized box of band aids for every place the wind has brushed their delicate skin. I think my kids have confused band aids with some kind of ugly sticker they can just stick all over their bodies for funnsies. Bonus points if you include a beautifully wrapped box of kleenex for the tears that are sure to follow the removal of all those band aids.
8. Leftover gift wrap ribbon. Seriously. Why spend $4.99 + tax on a ribbon wand when you can just present the leftover ribbon from the epic wrapping of your other awesome gifts. If your kids are particularly clever they can tie it to the stick and have a grand time. If your kids aren’t particularly clever you might find them tying one end around their neck and the other around the hallway banister. Christmas is full of surprises!
9. Costco sized ketchup. They demand it on everything, so they must really love it. Anything that inspires such a strong heartfelt reaction has earned its place under the tree. Feel free to sub for which ever condiment that your kid must have. True story, one time the small one mixed her applesauce and ketchup and then ate it all with a spoon.
10. A trash bag. For all the random toys that your kids received this year for Christmas that they either A. Ignore in lieu of the box/packaging it came in or B.Lose in 2 months for bad behavior or refusing to clean up. Don’t throw those toys out though! They will look fantastic under the tree next year!